Four weeks and counting!

Well life has been busy, but we're all hanging in there! We've survived Hayden's first (mini) illness and all came out virtually unscathed. He had a little cough and a bit of a runny nose, but I think we're all better now. As a result of his cough, I am now in love with and forever indebted to his adorable frog humidifier.

Nights have been in a word, challenging. Hayden would sleep for about two or three hours after dinner, and 10 or 11 pm is when his night really started. Unfortunately for me, nights wouldn't end until around 4 or 5 am, so I was exhausted. My trial and error process never seemed to produce the desired effect (sleep) for very long, so we've been a tired house! I had a pretty strong moment of clarity about a week or so ago, realizing that Hayden is in general probably pretty stressed out about his life. For nine months, he was in this cozy little haven, eating and sleeping anytime he wanted, with perfect temperature control and no dirty diapers or spit-up to deal with. So being out has probably been a giant culture shock for him. I realized his absolute helplessness was making him cry whenever he needed something, and that he is completely dependent upon us to fix whatever is making him cry. So while it may be stressful for me, nights are probably torture for him.

The problem with nights was that I literally had to be "on" and active for four hours in the wee hours of the morning. Feeding, burping, changing, rocking, bouncing, swaying, dancing, singing...trying to figure out what he needed to be calm and to sleep. Of course, Jay turned the lightbulb on for me yesterday when he gave Hayden his pacifier. I've been pretty resistant to the pacifier, until I discovered my baby is a "super sucker", meaning the sucking reflex is probably what calms him the most. I had tried a few times to give him the pacifier and he resisted, so I gave up pretty easily. Yesterday I watched Jay hold it in his mouth for about 10-15 seconds until he stopped crying and immediately started sucking on it. I realized I just needed a little more perseverance. Sure enough, a few more seconds of waiting and he LOVES this tiny piece of BPA-free plastic and silicone!

The big test came tonight after he went "down for the night", which is a joke for a four-week-old breastfed baby. Two hours later, he woke up and I fed him. After the burp, I reached for the pacifier, and the skies opened up. Back to sleep at 1am with little effort! He still has a little trouble deciding what's night and what's day, but the quiet at 3am (with a little help from his bouncy seat, our lifesaver right now) is priceless. I imagine there are about a million more hurdles to sleep in our future, but for now I will take this victory! I'm starting a new book, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, that many of my fellow moms swear by.

Jay and I spent the day cleaning and once we tackle a few small tasks tomorrow, we'll be back on track with a presentable house. Life seems much easier when I can walk in a clear path in my living room, and when I'm not tripping over shoes in the bedrooms. Things are looking up, and we're finding that we can do this parenting thing!