Day 15: Tuesday, or, the new Monday

I have a feeling I will spend the whole week not knowing what day it is. It's SO hard to go back to work after a long weekend!

I was pretty excited to start my day with an Isagenix shake Tuesday morning. I needed that feeling of a plan, to know what I'm eating, to be back on track and the shake is a great way to start. So I filled up my water cup, shook up my shake, packed my bags and got out the door.

I could tell a little difference in my energy level because of the easy weekend I'd had. I have a good routine down for shakes/water/snack during my work day and loved getting back to that. It was a little harder to get all my water in, since I was used to limiting my intake in the interest of making it home in a decent time. I noticed I was a little hungrier (presumably after some snacking this weekend my body wasn't used to) but still kept up my regular pace and routine.

I was ITCHING to get back into the gym. Once I start working out, I love it. It's just the starting that's hard, which is why I did this 30 day challenge in the first place. Helping my body remember how I feel when I'm exercising was the hardest and easiest thing to do. Doing workouts I never thought of or exercises I'd never tried has been really fun, but it's more fun to know what I'm doing. It's also fun to compete with MYSELF. I have an app as part of this challenge that I log my workouts in as I'm doing them. So that way I can see how many reps and with what weight I have done each exercise. This is important for me because it's a more realistic way to track my progress than the scale or even measurements. It gives me a baseline for improvement without having to remember, "What did I bench last time? Which dumbbells did I use?" and gives me a challenge to myself to try harder each day than I did the day before.

I still hate the cardio sprints but I worked harder on those this time than I did the previous two weeks; faster and for longer. Not by much, but going from 25 to 30 seconds at a full sprint seems like a lifetime!

Ab day is getting both easier and harder, which makes me see and feel my progress. I have a lot of old baby weight hanging around to get rid of before I "see" the progress and I'm a LONG way (perhaps light years) from visible abdominal muscles. But I'm getting there!

Dinner was a quick, leftover affair which was AWESOME to get all that stuff out of my fridge. It was also awesome to have several options of lean protein, of complex carbs, from which to choose. Our stop at the grocery store yielded a few perishable staples for my family (juice, milk) but also a cart nearly half full of fresh fruits and veggies. THESE are the changes I wanted to be making.

Also, the scale continues to be a liar, worthless, and on its last days in my bathroom!

Day 14: Monday, also known as, day in the car

So I'm all out of sorts over Monday. I had a plan for two weeks where every day was basically the same. This Monday was a mess. Not a literal mess, it just wasn't the same as the past two Mondays. I could have had a shake for breakfast, but I had eggs (no regrets). I hadn't had a breakfast I could chew in 13 days and eggs are the jam. No toast, no actual jam, just some eggs.

We got on the road and drove a pretty good bit before we stopped for lunch. I had a choice, and really wrestled with food vs. shake. In the end, I chose food. I like this challenge for many reasons, but I also know when it's over, I won't drink my breakfast and lunch every day. Instead, I got a wrap from Chick Fil A (no dressing) and fruit cup (thank you, CFA, for not having a melon in sight in your fruit bowl; berries and apples, a few mandarins and it's perfection. Fibrous fruits that are light on the sugar and in great portions. thank you.) My family doesn't eat fast food very often but when we do, I need to have the presence of mind to choose the stuff that's not awful. The wrap was actually pretty delicious and I didn't feel like I normally do when I go for a fried chicken sandwich and fries.

I had to dial back my water consumption a bit in order to keep from stopping every 30 minutes on a 7-hour drive. I still REALLY want a coffee but I'm not dying yet so I'm holding strong.

We got home and I really thought about a shake for dinner but again, life without shakes exists and I need to make good choices. So I had some leftover salmon (because I had controlled my portion earlier in the week!) and veggies and did not repeat DID NOT have the bowl of cereal I wanted at 8pm. That's the HARDEST DAMN THING y'all. I have had a bowl of cereal post-dinner almost every night since 2008. Weird that I've gained weight, right? I like old people cereal; low sugar, high fiber, tastes like grains. I just do. Sure, an occasional Golden Graham here and there, but I'm a Special K/Raisin Bran/plain Cheerios/corn flakes kinda gal. But it's still unnecessary refined sugar, carbs and not much nutritional value, even the protein ones. I let myself believe it was "better than dessert" for a long time but the truth is, it's kind of the same. So I hope to continue giving it up after this challenge, but I'm also not going to throw myself in the pit of despair if I do it once or twice.

The other hard part of Monday is that there just wasn't time and energy to do my Monday workout, nor the tools I needed because I work out at my gym at work and don't have those things at home. I contemplated switching out my Saturday workout (steady state cardio + tabata finisher) since I *can* do that at home. But I was just plain exhausted from the weekend, driving, light sleep and being in the car with three people for half of the weekend. My challenge now is to fit my 7-day week into 6 without being ridiculous. I hate a cleanse day but I really want to complete the whole challenge. I *can* workout on a cleanse day but I'll have to figure out a good way to do that, or skip the cleanse day, or skip a workout day. Friday is usually an "optional" workout day but I LOVE that workout. Maybe I could add half of that workout to Sunday's rest day (the part I can do at home, bootie blast) and do half a workout on my cleanse day? Or skip the cleanse day altogether? Goodness. This is why I have a coach for this challenge! I'll see what she thinks. It probably shouldn't be all that serious, but I am a planner and hate things out of order!

Day 13: Sunday

Sunday wasn't a whole lot different. We stayed up late but not all night. Shake for breakfast and lunch, snack, and the other half of my Saturday work out (Tabata finisher). This is the one Lila likes to do with me but she gave up halfway in and continued to watch Big Hero 6. I don't blame her. But I was glad to be getting SOME exercise in even if it wasn't in order. Sunday is technically a rest day but I didn't do this on Saturday so I figured I could do a 30 minute workout even on vacation.

This is what I'm realizing about my life. I CAN get in a 30 minute workout on vacation, on a busy day. I just have to make time for it and excuse myself from 30 minutes of laziness swapped for 30 minutes of using my muscles.

We had a birthday party to go to so we got ready and headed to see The Millers! Man it has been a minute since I've been on a military post, and I've never lived on post (stateside, OCONUS or otherwise) so I had to remind myself of a lot of things. The kids had a BLAST with their old friends and some new ones and we had a great time catching up with our old friends. I opted out of the sweets and snacks, so again didn't feel terrible about eating a burger (no bun) and some beans and macaroni for dinner. Salad isn't always an option, but it's also not always what I want to eat. I don't feel like I "failed" my challenge for eating a burger on Memorial Day weekend. Instead I feel like I put my good habits into play when I could have chosen otherwise.

And Sam, I'm probably the reason you ran out of bottled water! I think I had 8 while I was there (the little 8 oz ones). But it was hot! Sam makes delicious baked goods and next time I'll enjoy them! Hayden had my share this time, with cake & ice cream, a cupcake and one MORE cupcake before we left. It's vacation, right?

Day 12: Saturday

Our trip took FAR longer than expected due to some (avoidable) setbacks so we got in around 2am. Yikes! That meant not as much sleep as I would have liked for sure. But I stuck to my usual routine: breakfast shake, water, midmorning snack of apples and almonds, lunch shake. Dinner I knew would be a little tricky since it's a weekend for BBQing! But I did half of my Saturday workout, which is 30 minutes of steady-state cardio. This is usually a walk for me, but since I had a pool handy I used that to my advantage. Swimming is great exercise and I wish I had access to a pool all the time!

Dinner wasn't the worst choices- grilled chicken was my protein but "BBQ foods" were mainly my choices for sides. So I enjoyed a little macaroni salad, a deviled egg and some corn on the cob. Not my usual greens and complex carbs, but I enjoyed myself in moderation so I didn't feel too badly about it. I still avoided alcohol, caffeine and sugar so I don't think I really "fell off the wagon".

Day 11

Friday. Big day. Busy day. Perfect day to challenge myself!

It's an optional workout day but since we are outta town this weekend I figured I betta WORK. 

It's a complex day, with different sets of muscles being worked all together. I found that with even a slightly stronger core, I had better balance and form. I upped some weights in places and reps in others. 

After that I did try the optional Bootie Blast I hadn't done before. WOW. Bootie burn is more like it. So. Sore! But worth it. 

I ran errands, picked up a kid, met everyone at home, packed the car and hit the road for our GA trip. I am def nervous about maintaining my challenge expectations and goals while away. Fingers crossed! 

Day 10

1/3 of the way through! I noticed a significant difference in my gym workout today, after our challenge call. I wanted to push myself more, I wanted to work harder.

Initially I wondered, "Why don't we have a FB group?" or something like that to keep us accountable, to check in on, etc. On day two I realized how disastrous that might be! Because the second someone had different results than me, different progress, despite a different starting point, I would likely be discouraged. I love that NO ONE I know is doing this challenge along with me, because I'm not spending time comparing myself to anyone but me. I am in competition with myself.

I tried out my hummus kale deviled eggs as my post-workout snack yesterday and I think I enjoyed them as much as one can enjoy a deviled egg without mayo and with kale. I like mixing it up though and this was a good way to do that.

Some nights I haven't been as hungry at dinner as others, but I knew Cleanse Day was coming up so I didn't skimp on my (appropriately-sized) portions of protein, veggies and brown rice (my fave) at dinner. I did find that I was better at recognizing when I was full and not trying to make myself eat everything on my plate.

My legs and butt were still sore from Day 9 when I went to bed on Day 10, so hopefully that means progress!

Day 9: ROCK your life

Today was a good day in the gym and in my eating habits! The water is going down, the weights are going up, the sweat is running down and the heart rate is going up. I continue to be excited for "after"...for the habits I hope to keep after June 11, the progress I can make after I'm not mentally and financially committed to a 30-day challenge.

Tonight I rushed home right after work (gym was at 4) and made some delicious turkey burgers for dinner. I usually skip the bun and cheese anyway so this isn't a big meal adjustment for me. I was DYING for a good turkey burger with tzatziki sauce (the only thing I've ever actually used plain nonfat Greek yogurt for) so I whipped some up. My garlic salt comes FLYING out of this new container so it was a little grainy and more salty than I wanted. But I'll try again! I also tried out Perrier Sparkling Water with grapefruit. Ironic, since I enjoy neither sparkling water nor grapefruit, but I was fighting a juice craving. It's not bad! It's not my favorite, but a good alternative to juice and soda.

The reason I rushed home was because we had a check-in call at 7 and I wanted to be done with dinner and ready for it. So I was. And then I discovered I read it wrong and it was in fact at 8. So that gave me time to shower and get settled in before our call at 8.

Our call is like a webinar, where we can see and hear Erica (our Sisters in Shape coach) and we can chat with her and each other via text box. So it was a good check-in and place to ask questions, but also a great motivator! We were through week one so we had a good handle on the meal plan, the exercises, the routine. So this call was a challenge, to ROCK our workouts this week. Erica used the work "rock" as a verb, but also an acronym. For the Reason we're doing it (do you know why you're doing this challenge? Have you told someone about it to help keep you accountable?); the Opportunity we have (both physically and mentally but also financially if we're interested in joining her team); Change (look at the changes we've already made and how we can make them lasting habits); and KILL the voice. This was my favorite! Kill the voices that tell you "you don't have time for this", "you'll never be able to do this", "you're not strong enough". Erica shared some of her story with us and it was so nice to hear things coming from a REAL person; not a sales and marketing standpoint, not a "buy my book and products" person, not someone who was single, independently wealthy, without kids, etc. She's so real and honest and that is a big part of why I feel like I can do this challenge. She's not judgmental, she's compassionate and she knows where many of us are coming from as we began this challenge.

I'm not into motivational speakers. It's not my thing. But there was something about our call that was super uplifting and made me want to be successful. Something about women supporting each other, even when we have different goals and are in completely different places. And really, something about perfect strangers lifting each other up instead of so much of the tearing down you see these days. I'm pumped for the rest of this week and this challenge!

Day 8

Week one down! 

Start of week two. I have a better handle of what to do when and how the exercises work. I'm more confident in the gym but also realistic! I have limitations, but I'm pushing myself and challenging myself more every day. 

I look at food differently already. Food for fuel. Knowing how different I feel after a week of no caffeine, no alcohol, no processed food, no sugar, and nearly no dairy and gluten is really changing the way I look at how I eat, prepare and shop. 

This week I swapped my apples for berries and love knowing what foods fuel my body and my workouts. 

I still hate the cardio sprints but I'm digging the rest of the program. Water consumption wasn't quite up to par after a leisurely Sunday but I hope to get back up to almost a gallon tomorrow. 

Cool water shakes are not awful, just took some getting used to! 

Week 1 observations

So I'm down a full week of the program. Yay! 1/4 of the way there, and I'm still standing. Here's a few things I learned:

* My cold water trick for the shake backfired, as it makes it more difficult for the shake to completely be absorbed. But after drinking them a few days, I don't need them as cold. So back to cold-ish water!

* I can learn to eat some veggies, but there are others I just. can't. do. No matter how small they're chopped or what they're mixed with (I'm looking at you, cucumber)

* I have a terrible, toxic relationship with food. I eat for no reason. This week I've reminded myself, every time I eat, "You're eating for fuel". I need to pay attention to what I'm eating.

* This challenge is about structure and habits, but not set-in-stone methods. I need to have things on hand to snack on  when I get hungry that are good for my body, will satisfy my cravings and fill me up. Otherwise I'm stuck with being hungry (and hangry) or making bad choices.

* I really do like the convenience of Isagenix shakes. I won't drink them twice a day every day when this challenge is over, but I would love to have them on hand for days I know are going to be crazy or I just won't have time to eat in the morning.

* I really like working out! I like the burn, the sweat, the almost-throw-up feeling when I'm done. Knowing I have pushed my body and it pushed back and we made it through it.

* The scale is a liar! I stayed off the scale all week (which was surprisingly challenging; I had NO idea how many times a day I hopped on it "just to see") and when I got on it Sunday, there was little change from the previous week. I KNOW muscle weighs more than fat. I KNOW it takes time to see progress. But I feel different, my progress pictures are different, my measurements are different, and the scale hasn't caught up. So it was a little bit freeing to know I didn't need to pay attention to those numbers to feel like I was doing something right. Suck it, scale. Also, I have a significant weight fluctuation throughout the day, so I can't wait to ask my trainer about that during our progress call tomorrow night.

* There is a huge difference when I don't eat dairy or carbs. I will never give those up. But I need a better relationship with them.

* I have survived a week without coffee. I can do it. But I'm gonna get one in this week, an iced one with natural sweetener and a splash of milk. I just have to.

* I can do this!

Day 7

Rest day!

Sunday was a little calmer since Jay works ALL day and it was me and the kiddos. The problem with calm is that it lacks structure! That's the hardest part for me: the senseless eating. I'm around, the food is around, I eat when I'm not hungry. So I was excited to conquer a lazy day.

I got a small workout in by mowing the yard, which ended up being a terrible error in judgment since I woke up bothered with allergies. It was full on miserable after mowing and kicking up all that dust and grass. But a good little cardio blast in the heat!

So I haven't had much dairy this week, save for a literal, actual teaspoon of cheese on my salad one night. I am a milk/cheese GIRL. I love my dairy. But I know it causes a good amount of bloat so I have been pretty good about eliminating it. I did have a snack last night with plain nonfat Greek yogurt with strawberries and cinnamon. Well. If all dairy tasted like that, I could give it up no problem! I realized I had never had plain Greek yogurt and it is TART. Even with sweet strawberries it was hard to get down. I have some agave syrup I may dabble on there (the recipe in my cookbook calls for Stevia, which I don't have, and peaches, which I subbed the berries for because peaches aren't in season yet!) next time to make it feel like I'm treating myself.

I did measurements and progress pics (torture) so I can see progress. That's why I'm doing this, among other reasons, is to see a difference. I found that by dinner, I didn't really want a full plate (even of fish, brown rice and veggies) and wasn't hungry when I went to bed, so something is working!

Day 6 : Saturday

I have definitely been concerned about the weekends for this challenge! Rightfully so, since no two weekends are ever the same and they all come with different challenges. This weekend was no exception from our crazy life!

Jay worked this weekend so the morning started off slowly (thankfully since I got home late!) and I didn't want to do much moving early. We rarely have much time to "do nothing" so I enjoyed a movie in bed with the little ones. Shake and such for breakfast, the usual routine for this 30 days. We had some running around to do when Jay got home mid-morning so I brought my water and nuts along for my morning snack. My timing was a little off since I started later than I do Monday-Friday but that's when I realized this plan is supposed to make my life EASIER. Not harder. So I relaxed a little bit and tried to make it work for me.

We went to Family Fun Day at Hayden's school, with lots of bouncy houses and climbing things and music and Kona Ice. And pizza and Chick Fil A. I'm finding the willpower gets easier when I notice how much better my body feels without the excess, without the junk. It's easier not to put sugar and such into my body when I haven't missed it this week. But it was HOT out there which zapped me pretty quickly!

We took a trip to the Farmers Market and the grocery store and my cart was FILLED with fresh fruits, veggies and lean meats. As a general rule we are good with fruits and lean meat; the veggies are a struggle because I don't eat as many as most people. I did pick up some kale and have high hopes for it.

At around 6pm I did my short Tabata Finisher workout, with my little sidekick in tow! Lila wanted to help and "Play too" so she did my workout with me. This is a big part of my motivation for this challenge: I want my kids to see me making healthy choices too! After dinner I did my steady-state cardio 30 minute walk (man it was still hot out!) and it went by pretty quickly. It also felt like a nice stretch out for my sore muscles.

Day 6 in the books!

Day 5: optional workout

So day 5 has an optional workout and I decided I really wanted to do it. Day 5 also fell on a busy Friday so this was tricky. I packed a gym bag with shower supplies because I knew my workout would be midday with me returning to work, and that I was meeting my wine club right after work with no time to go home in between. 

I like to work out at 4 so I can go straight home. But Friday we had a retirement party for our beloved Admin Asst who was leaving after 12 years. So I wasn't missing that! I went to the gym at 2 and realized my shower plans were foiled because of exams in Bryant Hall (no access to showers) and because I forgot a towel! 

After my workout I was as usual a sweaty mess and my hair was atrocious. So I washed my hair in the bathroom sink with much difficulty but I did it! Lack of towel? Improvise. Used my gym shirt. I'm a genius. 

At the party I had delicious options including my favorite, carrot cake. Hard to resist but I did! I brought my own carrots and hummus and had a few strawberries. There will always be another carrot cake, right? 

I left work to meet my wine club at Friendly center. We went to Whole Foods for dinner where I tried a few things with veggies in them I don't normally eat. I'm trying! Eventually I settled on salmon and black bean quinoa salad. It was a little easier to walk by the "cookies by the pound" station. But they did smell delicious. As did all the tasting wine. 

We went to see Pitch Perfect 2 (it was aca-awesome) and popcorn is definitely my fave. But there will be more! Afterward we went to Wine Styles and I sipped my water while my friends enjoyed bubbly Prosecco. Next time I'm all in, guys! 

When I came home I didn't feel bloated and uncomfortable and was proud of my willpower. I'm interested to see how that compares when the challenge is over and I'm not able to use the same motivation to make better choices! 

Day 4 - Cleanse day

This was the day I was most nervous about! A whole day with no food seems kinda crazy. But it's a great reset for your body and part of my program so I'm committed! 

The day starts with 8 oz hot water and two scoops of the cleanse. It tastes like berries but more on the tart side than sweet! Most of the day is liquid with a few IsaSnacks and 1/4 Apple if needed to regulate blood sugar. Luckily I ended up driving most of my day so I was too busy to think about it. 

Dinner time was a challenge as it was pizza night in my house and that pepperoni and cheese smelled delicious in the oven. And we picked up the cookie dough fundraiser so I had to make room by baking the last of the other cookie fundraiser! I'm happy to report that I made it through cleanse day with no cheats! Super excited to eat again though, not gonna lie. 

No exercise on cleanse days since you're not fueling your body. Nice recovery day! 

Day 3

I'm finding myself waking up ready for those shakes! Today I finished in line to drop Hayden off (by 730) so I started on water. To my surprise I needed a fill up by Lila's school at 8 am! I was on a red nose hunt at Walgreens so I was drinking (water) and driving the first part of the morning. I was shocked to realize I was at 56 oz by 930 am!   

I could tell a difference in my morning snack by having both the apple and almonds. 

I had to run errands right at 12 so I had my shake early. Added plus of Isagenix shakes for lunch: I can drink them anywhere! I really appreciate the convenience on a busy day. I opted for just my carrots and hummus to go with my shake so I have mixed greens in the fridge waiting for Friday!

My workout was awesome and again I knew how to do all the exercises so I was feeling good about doing it. I am so glad I work and work out at a women's college. Maybe after this 30 days I'll be less intimidated by the gym and by men at the gym. But not yet! 

Dinner was chicken and the veggies I'd roasted Monday night which was perfect since the salmon I planned to cook was bad. Waited too long! 

My total water intake by day's end was 142 oz! 

Day 2

So I have a terrible relationship with food. I eat for no reason. Today I thought about giving up. Not because this is impossible (it's supposed to be hard, it's a challenge) but because I just want to eat. Not because I'm hungry; because I'm used to just eating. What a stupid reason to give up. On day two. 

That's WHY I'm not giving up. Because I don't have a good reason to quit, but a million to keep going. 

Tonight while checking over my screenshot of the program I discovered that my morning snack was Apple/pear/berries AND 12 unsalted almonds. I thought it was OR. So imagine my delight to find that I can have both! It's the little things. 

My legs are sore from Day 1, and today has squats. Yikes! I felt more confident in the gym today because I knew how to do all the exercises without watching the videos. And, because day 2 has no abs. 

Body Forward: Day 1

I promise not to post every day. And that they won't be as long.

I got up when my alarm went off and headed right downstairs. Before I went to bed Sunday I took a screenshot of my "shake days" plan so I have access to it all the time. I knew that my first step was an early morning "tea" with Isagenix Supreme. I measured out my water, heated it up and stirred in a scoop of Supreme. It doesn't have a whole lot of flavor but tastes like apples and vanilla so at least it's not offensive to the senses.

My third "aha" moment was the convenience factor of the shakes. Chocolate is in the canister with scoop; berry is in the packets. I do have my old formula shaker that Jay uses for his protein powder but in the interest of convenience and consistence, I decided that I would do chocolate in the mornings and berry for lunch.

I decided to keep notes in my phone to track my progress outside of the Trainerize app. This way I can track my water consumption, the times I eat, even my bowel movements. Sorry, TMI, but this plan is supposed to aid with digestion and girl can use all the help she can get! I mixed my shake, took my Natural Accelerator, filled up my water cup (Starbucks insulated cup with a straw is my best chance for getting in the water I need), tossed my dry roasted almonds in the bag along with my shake pack for lunch, IsaSnacks, plain mixed green salad and IsaLean bar. In my gym back I packed my clothes, my shoes, some deodorant and body spray (you're all welcome) and hoped I was getting out the door with everything I needed.

The challenge started with a call on Sunday night that I wasn't able to attend (see: Mother's Day laziness) so once I dropped both kids off I let that play while I was driving (thanks Bluetooth) (safety first). I finished my shake on the way to work and started in on my water. I'm concerned with making sure my dental health doesn't suffer so I drink water right after my shake to wash it down and get all the stuff off my teeth! By the time I got to work I was already 16 oz in of my water so I'm feeling pretty good about it. I'll spare you all the details in paragraph form but I'll show you what a day on the 30 Day Body Forward Challenge looks like!

Here's what the breakdown of my day looked like when it was all over:

630 6oz water + Supreme
730 8 oz water + IsaLean chocolate shake; Natural Accelerator capsule
830 16 oz water
1030 16 oz water
11 12 unsalted almonds
1130 16 oz water
1240 mixed greens salad with balsamic vinegar, 16 oz water
115 8 oz water + IsaLean berry shake
330 16 oz water, 1 Isa Snack
4 workout!
530 1/2 IsaLean bar
6 16 oz water
730 5oz grilled tuna steak, 1/2 cup brown rice, 1 cup green beans
915 16 oz water
10 1 IsaFlush capsule

Here's what I learned:
* 96 oz is a lot of water! And I didn't quite make my goal, but it's day 1. I'm learning.

* I am really surprised at how the shakes keep me full. I am a classic overeater, and I eat for no reason! I'm glad to have this to keep me under control.

* Heat feels different when you're hydrated! I sat in the sun yesterday just to get out of my office for a few minutes. 15 minutes in direct sunlight at 80 degrees and I loved it instead of hating it!

* By dinner time I was hungry but halfway through I felt myself getting full! It's also REALLY hard for me to eat a normal portion of brown rice because I LOVE it. So I measured it and only ate what was on my plate!

* I love having the workout videos right at my disposal so I can see the proper form, but I need to make time pre-workout to familiarize myself with the workout itself. That way I'm not wasting time at the gym watching the videos for the first time.

* I can do this!!

Body Forward Challenge : Prep work

So last week I decided to make a few changes even before I decided to do the Body Forward Challenge. Little things, like upping my water intake and working on portion control. I went to the gym during my lunch just to get in some light mileage on the elliptical and inch towards fitness. I got in a good sweat, got my heart rate up and was excited to start making these changes.

That's ultimately when I realized I needed The Plan. The all-encompassing to-do list that would put me on the track to success. So I bit the bullet, signed up for Body Forward and waited for my products to arrive, which they did on Friday!

This HUGE box arrived via UPS and I couldn't wait to dig into it. 30 days worth of stuff was a LOT. Two flavors of protein shakes, boxes of packets and containers of powder. A shaker with a bright green top for said shakes, which was currently packed with a sample of five different Isagenix add-ons.

Time out. Why Isagenix? I asked myself, I asked Val and did a little research. Could you do the 30 day challenge without Isagenix? The answer was no. In order to really track your diet and make sure your body was getting the exercise it needed along with nutrition, you needed the products. It's a CHALLENGE, meant to expose you to new ways of eating, thinking, planning and exercising. I was intimidated. I mean, what if I hated them? Don't you get tired of drinking your meals? Why can't I just eat a sensible breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks? I knew my answer to that one immediately...if I could do it on my own, I would have and would have already done it. Val answered all of my questions (plant-based nutrition, tastes great, perfect for on-the-go moms, high protein, soy and gluten free, some dairy free options).

Back to the box. It was also full of bottles of powders to mix with water (for cleansing, mental clarity), bottles of pills (natural accelerator), something called "Snacks" (which looked nothing like the snacks I know), a training manual and CDs and a measuring tape.

I got an email with instructions on how to set up my Trainerize app, PDFs of the calendar I need, the recipes, the plan itself (checklists! oh how I love a checklist!) and the workouts.

I had all the things I needed to get me started and to be successful, and for once, I was really excited about doing something hard, something different, something new.

On Saturday I decided I needed to test out one of the shakes to make sure I could even stomach it. I went with the Natural Berry (dairy free) one and mixed it up with 8 oz of cold water. I immediately realized that it would need to be colder. The taste wasn't bad, but I like stuff COLD. So my first plan: put my water in my shaker cup the night before and refrigerate. I read over the plan, looked at some of the recipes and had them in my head when we went grocery shopping.

Since the plan includes shakes for breakfast and lunch and only cooking dinner, I actually spent less at the grocery store than I usually do! I mentally purchased lean proteins, veggies and fruits with the stuff I normally buy; the only real addition was nonfat greek yogurt (plain) that I can mix with fruit and oatmeal and call "dessert".

My second "aha" moment was that I had chosen the beginner at-home workout, and that would allow me to make room for excuses once I got home. No no, you're doing this Jessica. So I asked Erica to switch me to the gym workout. When I reloaded the app, I noticed I had the Intermediate Gym workout. Hmm. I looked through it and was immediately intimidated. I couldn't do this stuff! And it was 5-day gym instead of 3-day like beginner. I thought. I thought some more. Maybe I should do the intermediate? Maybe I should REALLY challenge myself with this. Then I kept it real. I need to set myself up for SUCCESS and starting with a plan that I know I can't maintain is not the way to do it. I emailed Erica again (already getting my money's worth out of the Fitness Coach part of this challenge!) and asked her to correct the mistake. Once the beginner workout loaded, I skimmed it and knew THIS was my ticket to success.

I should have spent all day Sunday poring over the workout plan, the diet plan, and really digging into what I would be doing for 30 days. But I'll be honest: it was Mother's Day. I didn't want to. I read just enough to get me started on Monday and decided Day 1 is more important than Day Zero, and really just hoped I could get it together and not let myself down. By far, the worst thing ever was taking my "before" pics on Day Zero and seeing myself in a sports bra. And then I had to take them again, because they didn't upload to the app the first time. My second round of before pics were post-Mother's Day- lunch, which involved two glasses of wine, Caesar salad and lobster ravioli. Doh.

I went to sleep feeling discouraged, hating that I let myself get so unhealthy, terrified of the next 30 days.

30 Day Body Forward Challenge : Prequel

So I needed to make some big lifestyle changes and realized it all of a sudden. I'm always tired. My clothes don't fit. I eat too much. I don't exercise enough. There's a whole host of reasons. And none of them are new. But I never do anything one second before I want to do it, so I committed to doing this 30 Day Body Forward Challenge.

It's a lot. It's expensive. It's intimidating.

But I need a change, a big one. So I went to the pros, literally. My friend Val is a figure competitor and "Busy Mom Gets Fit" of FB, IG and international fame. She's also a really cool, down-to-earth mom that I used to drink wine and eat delicious German food with. She had a goal, she met it, she's positive and uplifting and she has over 350k followers. She's partners with Erica, of Sisters in Shape and National Bikini Competition fame. Who might know more about fitness for women than the two of them? No one I know personally, which is why I chose this program. I needed something I could TRUST, something that WORKS, something I had to PAY for. I've started all kinds of "free fitness" challenges and you know what? I wasn't invested in them, financially or mentally so definitely not physically.

I needed it ALL. Up until now, I've been piecing together nutrition advice, meal plans, workout plans (I use that loosely), the Gallon Challenge (truth: I always fail), portion control, and a myriad of other bits and pieces of advice and plans. This plan gives me a PLAN. For every day of 30 days. It gives me SUPPORT for every day of 30 days. It gives me shakes and supplements and snacks for every day of 30 days. It gives me a way to plan my meals...yes...for every day of 30 days. It gives me an app to track my progress, a workout plan for every day, videos of the exercises so I understand proper form and technique.

Most importantly, it gives me a plan for AFTER the 30 days. This is meant to be a CHALLENGE, a jumpstart to fitness, wellness, good choices and a new body. Because this one? Is old. It's worn out. It needs a recharge and deserves to be better maintained. My favorite part (without having started!) is the Body Forward Habits, aka, what I should takeaway from this challenge. Not a certain # of pounds or inches lost, not a target number on the scale, but habits I can form over 30 days to take with me when the shakes and supplements and workout plan are exhausted.

*I schedule workouts into my calendar - this is so important. I need to make a date with myself to be better.

* I drink 3-4 L of water a day - hydration is ridiculously important and I need to embrace it without artificial sugars and sweeteners

* I limit my intake of juice and soda- see above

* I always eat breakfast - this I am already good at!

* I have tools to help me stay consistent even when I'm busy or "life happens"- I'm hoping I like the shakes enough to keep them on hand for times like travel season when eating healthy is almost impossible

* I rarely eat out more than 1x a week - I definitely need improvement here!

* My cupboard has few "red zone: foods (cookies, chips, ice cream) - this is hard with a family that loves treats but I can do it!

* I have tools for inevitable cravings - plan!!

* I strength train at least 3x per week - this is my ultimate goal

* I have a friend, spouse or family member who is active with me and supports my lifestyle - my cup runneth over here. I have a SLEW of friends cheering me on from the sidelines, by my side and at my dinner table

When this 30 days is over, I will not be the size I want to be. I will not eliminate from my real life the things I'm eliminating from my life for 30 days (wine, cake, coffee, french fries) but I hope to add them back moderately and see the difference it makes to NOT have them so frequently. I hope to learn to love new vegetables that I have previously dismissed. I hope to inspire myself. One day I may hope to inspire myself. But today, and for the next 30 days...it's all about me.