Newborn pictures

While I was pregnant I contacted a photographer about doing some newborn pictures of our sweet girl. We didn't get to do these with Hayden in Germany, and I really wanted them so I figured we'd try with Lila. Even with coming three weeks early, our photographer had no problems fitting us into her schedule. She's awesome! She came to our house with a truck full of props, several cameras and a great portfolio. She uses all natural lighting and once we finally got going, we realized we were losing light quickly. So even though she was there over five hours, she just didn't get the shots she wanted. She came back the next day for no extra fee, and ended up getting everything we wanted in about two hours. We ended up with some really fabulous pictures that I can't wait to use to finish up some baby projects I've been working on!

Special delivery!

My sweet turtle!

My sleeping girl.

Such a princess.

Baby blocks.

My little ladybug.

Tarheel girl.

Sweet smiles.

Pretty in pink.

We have a bunch more, but this is enough for now. I can't wait to watch her grow and change!

My little gentleman

Hayden is growing up so fast! Lately, he has a thing for opening doors for people. It's very sweet, and he insists you walk through it while he holds it. Last night, he brought my prenatal vitamins down to me and said "Need take you medicine, make you feel all better". I told him I would take them soon, but I needed something to drink and I was feeding Lila. He walked into the kitchen, got his stool, got down one of his cups and walked to the fridge. He filled it halfway with water from the fridge (because when we let him pour his own, half is all we let him pour to avoid messes!) and brought it to me. He said "Here's your water. Now you feel all better."

My sweet boy.

Progress

We are slowly getting our house together, but things like holidays and babies keep slowing us down! We aren't undergoing any major renovations this year but we are all about some paint and organization. The only room that's completely finished is the dining room, and I LOVE it.

Hayden got a new big boy bed just after Lila was born. We upgraded him to the full size bed that would fit the headboard from his crib/toddler bed, deciding to skip the middle man of the twin size. He's a big kid, and with the new bed I can lay in it with him to read and snuggle before bedtime.

We're still in that process of figuring out what to keep, what to toss, what we need vs. what we want, where to put what, all that jazz. Lila's room is about the only one we have a clear picture on what we want, but that takes both time and money. This weekend we managed to finally get up her window treatments, and it's easy to see why this is my favorite room in the house.

We have one more piece of furniture to procure, lots to do in the way of decor and I decided on a project for her closet so this is definitely a work in progress!

Ten fingers, ten toes

Baby hands and feet have to be the best part of being a mom. Those tiny little digits, before they're all scratched up and grabby, have a way of making your day, just by looking at them.

See what I mean?

Mail surprises

This came in the mail shortly after Lila was born. Not a bad addition to a baby book if you ask me!

1 month

Look at me, I'm one month old!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Mommy's little valentine started the day off in this outfit...but went through SIX by the end of the day. Messy girl!

Tummy time

She is getting so strong already! We do tummy time to make her neck muscles stronger, but so far all she's done is fall asleep or roll off the mat.

Lila's first bath

Well it took that silly little stump forEVER to fall off, so Lila finally got her first real bath after almost three weeks. Just in the nick of time, since she was pretty over the sponge bath. But she has so much hair, and is prone to spit up so it gets stuck in all that pretty hair, so it became a necessary evil. I'm so glad I took an infant massage class with Hayden so I can use the same techniques on Lila.

I put her in the tub with her diaper on while I got the water ready, and so she could get a feel for the mesh part of her tub. I love this little tub!

She didn't love it, that's for sure! But we got through it, and after a few more baths have figured out what she likes and what she doesn't. I love to cuddle her after her bath, and she appreciates the extra snuggles.

Back to work

Yesterday was my first day back to work. Because of the logistics of when I started this job, when it became full time and when my benefits started, I hadn't been a full-time, regular employee for a full year when Lila was born. This means I wasn't eligible for FMLA, or voluntary shared leave (where my coworkers could donate their leave to me). So I had four weeks of leave built up, and that was it. I could have taken leave without pay, but since I carry our insurance I would not only be without pay, but would owe GTCC for my insurance. This just didn't make sense for two weeks at home, so I decided to come back after four weeks. What helped with this decision was that Jay would be home with the kids, and I wasn't having to send Lila to daycare. I figure I got to spend a whole year at home with Hayden, and then had all the time when Jay was in training, in Afghanistan and in the field...so now he gets to spend similar time with Lila (and Hayden too).

We are still figuring out the logistics of how everything works, but we got off to a good start yesterday. I went to the doctor for my four-week check up and to get my paperwork. My appointment was at 9, I was at my desk by 10. Before I left the house I made sure Jay had a bottle to get her started, pumped milk defrosted, Hayden and Oscar situated and plans to come home at lunch. Right now I have it in my head that I can feed her before I leave, pump once at work, go home for lunch to feed her, pump again at work and be home for her late afternoon feeding. That worked yesterday and so far works today, we'll see how it goes! I didn't have a lot of these issues with Hayden since I didn't work for the first year, so it's a lot of learning for us. But we seem to be handling it okay.

I made it through the day without any tears. I think because she's home with Jay and right down the road it makes it a little easier. Next up? Get pictures of her in my office so I can see her sweet face all day!

Thoughts on 30

Remember when 30 sounded so impossibly ancient you could never imagine being that old? Well here it is...or was, I should say. This time last year I thought about a trip for my 30th birthday...Vegas, or a cruise, somewhere fun and exciting and youthful and NOT 30. Shortly after some preliminary plans, I found out I was expecting, and realized I'd either spend my 30th birthday pregnant, in labor or nursing. And really, it didn't sound so bad. What's so scary about turning 30? I honestly can't remember. I wonder what my 20-year-old self thought I'd have accomplished at 30? If I think back, I vaguely remember the idea of having my Masters and living somewhere near my fabulous friends, working and certainly not being married. 30-year-old me is pretty proud to have accomplished my Bachelor's degree, having lived in Germany for almost five years, being a wife, mother of two and a homeowner by 30.

The day passed with little fanfare, as I was nearing the end of my maternity leave. I had phone calls and texts and cards, my parents came by with lunch, but mostly I spent the day in my own house with my sweet family. I didn't look for new gray hairs or wrinkles, or lament about the wild things I forgot to do before I turned 30. Maybe it's 30, or motherhood, or five + years of marriage, or my awesome friends and family, but there's a contentment that comes with knowing how to love, and in being loved. In the end, that's what it all comes down to. Because when I pictured a big trip for my birthday, the destination mattered not as much as who was with me. The Class of '04 said it best in our Fall Fest '03 sister song..."In the end I wanna be standing at the beginning with you."

So here's to 30. I still want to go to Vegas. But what a great early birthday present I received in my sweet little Lila.

Getting adjusted

Once we finally got home from the hospital, we could start getting used to our new family member. Luckily for us, she was pretty easy. Newborns do a lot of sleeping, and a lot of eating. But she has a really calm demeanor and is seemingly laid back, provided she has enough sleep and enough to eat. We noticed right off the bat that she is LOUD. She grunts, she groans, she gurgles...she even growls! Most of this happens in her sleep, which makes for less sleep for mom. I anticipated her sleeping in the bassinet in our room for about six weeks; because of said noises, this turned into about two weeks. We found we all got more sleep when she was in her room and I went to her when she actually needed something as opposed to every time she makes a noise.

Sunday-Tuesday we were in the hospital, and the day we came home was my first night alone with the two kids. Jay went back to work after having just Monday off (to stay home with Hayden) and I figured nighttime would be hit or miss. I can't lie, I was definitely anxious about bedtime for two babies, especially after a c-section, and given Hayden's history of not wanting to go to bed. Luckily he is just smitten with his baby sister and loves to help, and occasionally gives me a break. We all survived, and even got a little sleep!

The day after we got home we had to go to the pediatrician's office to check her weight. She was 7 lbs, 3oz and they seemed to be pretty happy with that. Travel was interesting, as I couldn't lift her and the car seat because of my incision, and wasn't allowed to drive as long as I was taking pain meds. But we managed until I felt comfortable lifting more weight and until I no longer needed the meds. Our first two weeks passed pretty smoothly, with Jay and I both home during the day and Hayden in daycare during the day. I was anxious to see how having us all home during the day would work out, but certainly ready to have Hayden out of daycare.

Our hospital stay

Needless to say, we were in the hospital much longer than expected since I had a c-section. We checked in Saturday evening fully ready to be gone by Sunday, but after surgery I wasn't discharged until TUESDAY. Which meant having LESS sleep than I would have had at home, and the boys were left to fend for themselves the first part of the week. Poor Hayden, he just didn't understand why mommy and his new baby sister couldn't come home. Sunday was a blur of doctors, nurses, feeding, changing, sleeping, eating, visitors and the like. I remember being surprised that I wasn't in much pain. I think it was late Sunday evening before my incision finally started to hurt and I needed a pain pill.

By Monday, I was ready to go. My doctor came to visit; the attending doctor who delivered her came to visit; her pediatrician came to visit. Then there were the people who needed to record her information for the birth certificate, the nutritionist and for the love of God, the lactation consultants. Here's the thing. I breastfeed. I judge not people that bottle feed, but I choose to breast feed. I did it for six months with Hayden but am planning on going the full year with Lila. Is that enough for the lactation ladies? No. They want to hear all about her wet and soiled diapers, want to know how often and long I'm feeding, want to "score her latch" while she's feeding...here's an idea, how about "don't call us, we'll call you"? They drove me nuts. My favorite? Every time they checked her sheet and wrote down that she ate for 15 minutes an hour ago, they'd look over the list with pleasant smiles and nods. Then they'd get to the previous page and find out *GASP* what happened after she was born.

What happened is that her blood sugar was low. So low that they couldn't give her a bath because a drop in her temperature would cause it to go even lower. So while I was in recovery, they brought her to me to feed. She latched right on, but the poor kid was just too tired to eat. So they took her back and said we'd try again later. They called from the nursery and asked if they could give her a small amount of formula to try to get it back up. After six months of nursing Hayden, I'm not an expert. But I'm a lot more comfortable this time around, which means I'm not a purist. I'm not worried about "nipple confusion" or my c-section preventing us from "adequate bonding" or that the taste of formula will RUIN her for the milk I make. I let them give her a syringe of formula. I LET THEM FEED MY BABY FORMULA. Oh, the displeasure on their faces when they saw that! I feel like I could have told them I was a meth head and they would have been fine with it, as long as I was still planning to breastfeed exclusively.

 The great thing about Monday was that Emily was there to have baby Link, and I got to go see her! I was ready to be up and at 'em and dressed and walking on Monday, so I walked down to her L&D room. Which, as luck should have it, had been my L&D room! Emily was excited to see me alive, as they had just told her a c-section was a distinct possibility for her. Nothing like seeing another Salem sister to make you even MORE excited about the birth of your baby! All told, I believe four Salem babies were born that weekend.

I did rather enjoy the room service experience, and my nurses that went to every corner of the hospital to find my cranberry juice. I was an easy patient, never paging them (why would I? They were in every hour regardless!) and my only request was the cranberry juice I had become addicted to since I was allowed liquids again...so they obliged. They kept saying how easy I was and how they wanted to do more...all I wanted was sleep and my own house. And the juice.

On Tuesday I expected to be kicked out by "check out" time at 11. So I ordered my breakfast early, packed us up, did my hair, etc. Jay got there at 10. Car seat was ready to be inspected. Lila was dressed. The only problem? No one seemed interested in discharging me on time. We waited and waited, and finally someone showed up. Oh wait, she's the picture lady. It was well after 1pm before my discharge doc came in, asked two questions and left. Then we had to wait again, for them to write up my notes and discharge papers. A little after 2, we were in the car and headed home. Without any cranberry juice for the ride. But with a sweet new girl snuggled in her seat, ready to go to her new house!

Now what?

A baby story

So we've been a little busy. But I figured I should update so I can remember all the details later!

On Saturday, January 21st we had a pretty normal day to start. Hayden and I got up and watched cartoons, waited on Jay to get up, cleaned and did some laundry. We didn't have anything planned for the day and were just hanging out as a family, enjoying the relaxing day. We ate lunch in the living room, and as I went to get up from the loveseat I felt something funny. Then I realized...my water had broken! I said to Jay, "Um, my water just broke?" and he jumped up, running upstairs to change (and get me a towel). Once I felt like I could safely head upstairs it dawned on me that I wasn't yet having contractions. To me, this meant I had plenty of time so I decided to take a shower and get myself "ready". Jay was a little surprised at my calm, but I knew we had plenty of time.

I showered, blow dryed my hair, finished packing our bags and the like while Jay got himself, Oscar and Hayden ready for a night away from home. Hayden was super excited to be going to my brother's, as was Oscar. We stayed pretty calm so we wouldn't scare him, but all the while I kept thinking "I cannot believe this is happening". Once I was finally ready we headed over to Eric's. I called my OB's office to figure out who the doc on call was and as luck should have it, it was my least favorite doctor. Figures. We dropped off the little guys and headed to Women's Hospital to get all checked in, a process I had made a little faster by pre-registering when I found out I was pregnant. The nurses did a few things, and walked me down the hall to labor & delivery.

We got settled in and found out I was only dilated to 3 cm. Nurses kept coming in and asking the same questions, I had monitors on me and an IV and was just sort of hanging out for a long time. We watched Duke lose to Florida State, and shortly after I asked for the doc to check me so I could make my decision on the epidural. He came in and found that while I was fully dilated, our Lila Bean was still fully breech, and informed me that they just don't deliver breech babies naturally anymore. Lots of stress on the mother and the baby, so we would need a c-section. As I had never even read that chapter in my baby books, I told the doc to get comfortable as I had questions.

He and the nurses walked me through the procedure, and everything started to happen really fast. I had a hairnet and Jay had a too-small gown, I was signing things while being wheeled down the hall, and then they took me into the operating room. Jay had to wait outside a bit while they prepped me. My anesthesiologist came in, talked me through the spinal block and all of a sudden I was laying down, losing feeling from the chest down and trying not to worry. Jay came in, and really wanted to watch the whole surgery but the nurses wouldn't let him. Bogus! I literally could not feel a thing, but then heard the nurse say, "Ok dad, I see a butt...stand up." He stood up, I heard a strong cry and felt the most enormous sense of relief. She was okay! In uncharacteristic fashion, I started to cry like a baby. It wasn't long before I got to see her in Jay's arms and she was just beautiful, with a head full of dark hair. My water broke at 1:30pm, we got to the hospital at 3:30pm, she was born at 8:21pm. Another quick delivery!

Jay watched as they cleaned and measured while I got stitched up and wheeled to recovery. I hung out there for about an hour and they brought my sweet baby to visit. At three weeks early she was a healthy 7 lbs, 8 oz and 20 inches. She looked so much like Hayden, and I couldn't wait for them to meet. I fell in love with my little girl immediately, this little eager beaver who just couldn't wait til her due date to meet us!

Getting ready

We decided after the showers, it was time to get ready for baby Lila! I set out putting together the bassinet for her to sleep in the first few weeks, and Jay and Hayden got busy on the crib. They both came together fairly quickly, working as a family. It's funny how much more calm you are with the second baby. We haven't stressed out about finishing the nursery, because we knew how much time she'd spend in the playpen, swing, car seat, bouncy seat, bassinet and our arms!

I also took a fun trip down memory lane as I went through all of Hayden's old baby clothes to pick out the things that Lila might use. Bibs, burp cloths, blankets and newborn clothes...it's hard to believe this wild three-year-old was once a tiny baby!

Showered with love

My Salem friends threw me an amazing shower to celebrate the impending arrival of baby Lila. We planned it for MLK weekend so our out-of-town guests could attend without rushing, and we had a blast! Lizard and Stephie came for the weekend to clean and set up, and we had dinner with some other Salem friends Friday night. We had a good ol' fashioned sleepover with chatting and catching up, baby stories and the like. I managed to stay up until about 2am, which is pretty good for a preggers, and finally had to hit the hay. The girls stayed up and with the help of Jay, finished up some "diaper decor" for the shower.

On Saturday morning, we all took our time getting up and ready. We had a few hours before the guests would arrive, but it was nice to have time to catch up and relax a bit. Lizard and Stephanie got busy straightening and shopping, preparing and decorating. When it was all said and done, everything was perfect! A beautiful mix of black, white, pink and diapers to welcome our baby girl!

We had so much food! Dips and sandwiches, shrimp and veggies, fruits and cheese, cookies and some of the most adorable cupcakes you've ever seen! Lizard even whipped up a "taste of home", adding bubbly water to lemonade like they do in Germany. It was perfect!

We had a great time playing games, opening gifts, swapping more baby stories and catching up with old friends. Who would have thought, when we were all hanging out on Clewell Patio and in Bitting basement, that this is where we'd end up?

Shredded pork

We needed something different to eat the other night. I had pork chops and no idea what to do with them, but I was tired of everything I'd done recently. So I tossed them in the crock pot with some brown sugar, honey, garlic and pepper. I set them to low for 4-5 hours, and ran a bunch of errands. While I was out, I stopped at Country BBQ (my very favorite NC BBQ place) and picked up a pint of their BBQ sauce. I came home, shredded the pork, added the sauce and cooked on low another 30 minutes. Voila! Pulled pork, which tasted like my favorite restaurant's, but for a fraction of the price.

Hayden had gotten a package from our friends the Bakers in Germany, full of kid-friendly cooking utensils. So he helped me stir the sauce, prepare the potato wedges and even make the baked beans. I debated hush puppies, but that's a lot of work for what was a low-maintenance dinner. The best part? Leftovers!

Starting off 2012

We knew this year was going to be about change. Our family was going to grow, we had set goals (not resolutions) and there were things to be accomplished. So we got down to business!

First, we figured out a plan for the kids. Jay signed up for two evening classes so Lila wouldn't have to go to daycare. Since I have to go back to work, we figured this would be best for all of us, as it would give them a chance to bond and keep me from freaking out about putting an infant in the arms of strangers for eight hours a day. Initially, we were going to keep Hayden in his new school until this summer, to allow Jay and Lila to get used to their schedule and to keep things consistent for Hayden. Then we figured out that more and more, we were unhappy with his current school. Rather than look for a new daycare from February til May, we just decided to go ahead and take him out. I struggled with it, but in the end his safety and well-being trump that of his socialization so we put in our two-week notice in mid-January. I slept better at night after our decision was final, and started to realize that Hayden didn't seem to like his new school all that much either. Win-win.

2012 is our year to get out of debt and be healthy. We have plans in place for both, we'll see how it goes!